The two practices that I found most beneficial are the subtle mind practice, and the loving kindness practice. The subtle mind practice is important for me because I have always had a very difficult time finding quiet in my mind for anything, whether it is to read a book, fall asleep at night, or even just to remember what I was getting up to go do. I think that the subtle mind practice is the jumping off point for all of the other practices, because to be able to complete the other practices we need to be able to quiet our thoughts and focus on one thing instead of the many other thoughts rushing through our minds. The loving kindness exercise is important to me because reaching out and showing compassion to people around me (beyond just my family and friends) is something I have been trying to work on. I found parts of the loving kindness exercise a little difficult for me, and to me that means it is something I should practice more and try to make a regular practice. I think I chose these two practices because I have the most to learn from them, and I would like to continue practicing and growing from them. 

The Integral Assessment

This week I participated in a Loving-kindness exercise and an Integral assessment. The Loving-kindness exercise was difficult, the repeating of phrases for 10 minutes was hard for me to concentrate on. I do truly wish all of the phrases for all individuals, I think that if everyone could experience health, happiness, and wholeness the world would be a very different place to live in! It is still difficult for me to keep my mind still and quiet, so concentrating on any one thing is definitely something that needs work. And it is definitely something I would like to continue working on.

For the integral assessment I found that when looking at my current levels of development in the different aspects of my life (psychospiritual, biological, interpersonal, and worldly) I have many varying levels of development. I don’t think that I necessarily have one aspect that is really a lot stronger than the rest. I know that the worldly aspect of my life is pretty seriously suffering, but despite seeing that, it still isn’t the first thing that I would choose to focus on growing and developing right now. Right now in my life I would choose to work on my biological and/or interpersonal aspects. These are two areas that I think are pretty close in how developed they are for me, but the situations in my life right now make them the most logical areas to focus on. While I am in school and a stay at home mom I have found the interpersonal part to be very important, I am at home with my kids all day, and while my relationship with them is very important to me, there have been times that I have struggled with having a lack of meaningful relationships in my life. I stay at home, so I had to actually seek out new relationships after moving to a new town, and that was difficult for me as I have always been very introverted. I have made some friends after being here a couple of years, but sometimes I really have to put effort into maintaining friendships and being a part of my community. The biological aspect is also becoming more and more important to me as I continue in my Nutrition program. The more I learn about nutrition the more aware I become of what I put into my body, of course, but it has also made me realize that I am really lacking in the fitness area, and that is something that I would like to work on. I mean, who would want to take advice from a dietitian that isn’t following her own advice?

I liked the integral assessment, it was eye opening for me to see what things are most developed (or underdeveloped) in my life right now and to realize what things are really the most important to me in my life. I see the worldly aspect of my life developing further after I finish my degree and have a job out in the real world. For now, for my sanity, I like to keep things close to home ;)

Loving Kindness Exercise

I found the loving kindness exercise a little difficult for me to focus on, but I did like it. I pictured my 4 year old son and all of the love that I have for him, sometimes I feel like I could burst with how much love I feel for that little boy :) Turning the love toward myself was more difficult, I could imagine doing it, but feeling that amount of love for myself was not a doable thing for me. I then pictured my mom, who suffers from fibromyalgia and has a lot of aching and pain pretty much constantly. I pictured her suffering as a black cloud of smoke that I inhaled into my own body and then dissolved into little grains of sand in my heart, then exhaled a white cloud of loving kindness and healing that surrounded her and as it surrounded her she looked stronger and happier.Imagining doing the same for strangers was more difficult for me, and that is something that I know about myself and would like to work past; feeling more compassion for people that I don't have a relationship with. While I found parts of this exercise to be difficult I would recommend it to others, it isn't meant to be easy, it is meant to be an exercise to better oneself. Mental workouts like these are meant to help us train our minds and reach deeper levels of our minds and lives that are otherwise underdeveloped.